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Virtual Life, Virtual Death?

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  #1  
Old 05-09-2017, 05:02 PM
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Default Virtual Life, Virtual Death?


I read that Hong Kong is leading the way in virtual cemeteries. ..

Burial has become an issue in U.K with our ever-burgeoning population and stringent rules about consecrated ground remaining untouched for seventy five years as the bare minimum.

Cremation for me - I can't bear the thought of anyone trimming the grass around my headstone and feeling obliged to visit a chunk of stone when they want to remember me.

So - virtual cemeteries - flames or sod - what's your preference?

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Old 05-09-2017, 05:17 PM
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I told my wife: when I die, pay a couple strong teenagers to throw my body in a dumpster down the alley. #hundredandfiftydollarfuneral
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Old 05-09-2017, 05:23 PM
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The Torajan people in Indonesia keep their dead in the house for up to twelve years. They inject them with formulin to slow down decomposition, set them up in their own room, and tend to them daily, addressing them as if they were still alive. They make their dead meals, and bathe their faces - just treat the corpse as if it was still alive. For them, it is the gentlest way to come to terms with death gradually.

How would your Mrs feel about that BP?
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Old 05-09-2017, 05:28 PM
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Oh hell no!

She's down with the dumpster idea. Two kids, $75 a piece cash, boom...

On the other hand, if she dies before me, she wants a grand funeral with all her friends dressed in their finest, two live bands, food and drinks and merriment, and she wants me to deliver a fiery eulogy all about her stunning beauty, charm and grace.

I'll do it too...
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Old 05-09-2017, 05:39 PM
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D'you reckon anyone will appreciate the irony of playing Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive" as my coffin trundles along the conveyor belt to the flames?

OK...what song are you going out to? What song says YOU?
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Old 05-09-2017, 05:41 PM
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Cremation for me. I don't care that much about the ashes.

Maybe surreptitiously sprinkle them onto the lawn at Graceland?
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Old 05-09-2017, 05:45 PM
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Creepy....I had Elvis belting out "The Wonder Of You" as I read your post.

Graceland seems a good choice for final scatterment.

What song would it be?
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Old 05-09-2017, 05:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Grace Gabriel View Post
D'you reckon anyone will appreciate the irony of playing Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive" as my coffin trundles along the conveyor belt to the flames?



OK...what song are you going out to? What song says YOU?


Highway to Hell - AC/DC
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Old 05-09-2017, 05:49 PM
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https://youtu.be/l482T0yNkeo
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:01 PM
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Originally Posted by Grace Gabriel View Post
Creepy....I had Elvis belting out "The Wonder Of You" as I read your post.

Graceland seems a good choice for final scatterment.

What song would it be?
Since I'm going to be cremated, how about "Burnin' Love?"
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  #11  
Old 05-09-2017, 06:01 PM
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Spike Milligan's headstone says:

"I told you I was ill"
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Myers View Post
Since I'm going to be cremated, how about "Burnin' Love?"
Or what about The Doors?

...come on baby light my fire...
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:11 PM
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Originally Posted by Myers View Post
Since I'm going to be cremated, how about "Burnin' Love?"
Originally Posted by Grace Gabriel View Post
Spike Milligan's headstone says:

"I told you I was ill"

Here lies Grace
It's not what she planned
She wanted to burn
With a fag in her hand
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:12 PM
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Good one -- I was trying to keep it Elvis themed.

Along those lines, I was thinking maybe his version of "My Way."

But given how things have turned out, maybe "Her Way" would be more fitting.
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  #15  
Old 05-09-2017, 06:15 PM
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I heard an extremely heated debate on the radio last week over who sung the best version of My Way. Poor old Elvis got slated.
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:18 PM
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Originally Posted by Grace Gabriel View Post
Here lies Grace

It's not what she planned

She wanted to burn

With a fag in her hand


When we were kids, my cousins and I would run around the mall at metro center placing cigarettes from the ashtrays (yes people could smoke in public then) into the hands and mouths of mannequins in the department stores. It was so fun!

I don't see why the mortician can't plant a Marlboro in your fingers before he sends you down.
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:21 PM
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Yep. Marlboro in one hand. Glass of wine in the other.

And a signed copy of "The Motorcycle" tented on my chest.
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  #18  
Old 05-09-2017, 06:31 PM
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Originally Posted by Grace Gabriel View Post
I heard an extremely heated debate on the radio last week over who sung the best version of My Way. Poor old Elvis got slated.
Sinatra wins out, I think -- because he did.
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:35 PM
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Originally Posted by Myers View Post
Sinatra wins out, I think -- because he did.
Have to agree.

Mind you, it's the only song of his that I like.

I bet if there's a poll for the most played songs at funerals it would be high on the list.
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:47 PM
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Totally love Sinatra.

His version of "In the Wee Small Hours of the Morning" did it for me. Literally choked me up.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MiPUv4kXzvw
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:53 PM
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I've just listened to that - I'll concede it's rather lovely.

Maybe I just haven't had enough Sinatra exposure to develop a taste for him.
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Old 05-09-2017, 06:55 PM
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Originally Posted by brianpatrick View Post
I told my wife: when I die, pay a couple strong teenagers to throw my body in a dumpster down the alley. #hundredandfiftydollarfuneral
When my sister passed away one of my mom's crazy friends said to dig a hole in the backyard and bury her there, which we were pretty sure wasn't legal. Also we have a lot of cats already back there so there's a good chance we would have dug one or more up.

I already specified where I want my ashes scattered. I see no reason to take up space in the ground and feed the worms.
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Old 05-09-2017, 07:04 PM
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I'm glad you listened!

Yeah -- not saying this is you, but people tend to form an opinion based on his persona and few of his more well-known songs. I know I did.

But he was a brilliant singer and interpreter. Once I did a deep dive into his music -- especially the records he did for Capital, I became a huge fan.

I think if you take the time to listen, you won't be disappointed.
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Old 05-09-2017, 07:05 PM
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Originally Posted by moonpunter View Post
When my sister passed away one of my mom's crazy friends said to dig a hole in the backyard and bury her there, which we were pretty sure wasn't legal. Also we have a lot of cats already back there so there's a good chance we would have dug one or more up.

I already specified where I want my ashes scattered. I see no reason to take up space in the ground and feed the worms.


Yeah. My burial will be cash paid, late at night, and my wife will play 'dementia' and claim to know nothing about it.
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Old 05-09-2017, 11:08 PM
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"I'm gonna live forever" Irene Cara.
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Old 05-10-2017, 04:17 AM
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Originally Posted by flyingtart View Post
"I'm gonna live forever" Irene Cara.
Will you be dubbing 'fame' with 'flame' to maximise the irony?
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Old 05-10-2017, 10:43 AM
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Tree or Scaffold like a Lakota Sioux or Cheyenne (and some East of the Mississippi tribes)

Put a few things, an old muzzleloader, a knife I've made, and so forth with me.

My dirge can be the Offsprings "GONE AWAY" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40V9_1PMUGM
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Old 05-10-2017, 12:25 PM
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I really love the idea of that Mohican.

Would'nt get away with it in U.K. I'd probably have decomposed entirely before the local council granted permission for my unusually large structure with invasive views of the neighbour's bathroom window.

Or they'd just clamp me.
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Old 05-10-2017, 12:28 PM
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Originally Posted by Myers View Post
I'm glad you listened!

Yeah -- not saying this is you, but people tend to form an opinion based on his persona and few of his more well-known songs. I know I did.

But he was a brilliant singer and interpreter. Once I did a deep dive into his music -- especially the records he did for Capital, I became a huge fan.

I think if you take the time to listen, you won't be disappointed.
I've given Frank a good going over this afternoon.

Really like "All My Tomorrows" - played that several times.
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Old 05-10-2017, 12:48 PM
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Originally Posted by Grace Gabriel View Post
I've given Frank a good going over this afternoon.

Really like "All My Tomorrows" - played that several times.
That's a good one -- another one of those lush ballads. Don't forget to check out the more swing oriented songs like "Night and Day" ('57 version) or "I've Got You Under My Skin" etc.

And sorry for my musical evangelizing. I'm rock and roll guy at heart and I was a grunge baby -- but I just keep working my way back.

So much great music -- so little time...

Oh -- and P.S. -- if you decide to buy some tunes, a good one to go with is "Classic Sinatra: His Greatest Performances 1953–1960." Unless you're really into it, that might be all you need.

Last edited by Myers; 05-10-2017 at 12:53 PM..
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