Ah, you tried both styles, I see! I liked the didactic one best. You start with "dream" and I expect happiness and rainbows. Instead, you surprise me with a sense of weariness. Then equating "dream" and "life"... interesting! Perhaps I'd like the Crapsey cinquain more if I knew what "step-brother syndrome" is. I googled it and got a few football sites
Anyway, thanks for posting! Did you enjoy working with the cinquain form?