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9&60 Ways - Meter - mini-lesson 1 - iambic rhythm

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Old 04-17-2015, 05:17 PM
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Default 9&60 Ways - Meter - mini-lesson 1 - iambic rhythm


9&60 Ways - Meter - mini-lesson 1 - iambic rhythm


If you haven't read "A Crash Course in Meter", I encourage you to do so now. It explains strong and weak syllables, how they can be indicated in the analysis of word rhythms using capital and lower case letters: i Want / to GO / out-SIDE / to-DAY / and PLAY (that's iambic pentameter).

The most commonly used rhythm in English poetry is iambic, W S / W S /, etc., alternating weak syllables followed by strong syllables: da DUM / da DUM / da DUM

A few historical examples:

to BE / or NOT / to BE

in FLAN- / ders FIELDS / the POP- / pies GROW

it IS / an AN- / cient MAR- / i-NER


Now it's your turn. I suggest that you begone by writing iambic sentences. Don't worry about line lengths or rhyme or any other considerations. Think of it as iambic prose.

Some examples:

the CLOUDS / are FLUF- / fy IN / the SKY / to-DAY.

i WANT / to GO / to EUR-/ ope IN / the SPRING.

in ALL / the WORLD / there IS / no FIN- / er THING / than LOVE.

Please post your examples in this thread. I will comment to whatever extent I think helpful, as will others - and feel free to join into any discussion that arises.

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Old 04-18-2015, 12:42 PM
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I've read your work and like it some

I tried it once and had some fun

how brave you are to try again

I'll say again enjoyed the try

one more line which is out of place

think you meant begin not begone.

I know this sucks but it was fun

and keep up the good work, seven, eight



oh and feel free to use this to tell, or is it show, others what not to do.

have a good day Lon.

max

sorry edit - I went down to feed the chicken after I posted this and remembered this is a ten count not eight. maybe i'll try again later
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Last edited by max crash; 04-18-2015 at 01:16 PM..
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Old 04-18-2015, 06:28 PM
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Originally Posted by max crash View Post
I've read your work and like it some

I tried it once and had some fun

how brave you are to try again

I'll say again enjoyed the try you're fine so far

one more line which is out of place this is not iambic - ONE more / LINE which / is OUT / of PLACE - the first two feet are trochaic (SW) and the last two are iambic (WS) - you could fix it like this: i SEE / a LINE / that's OUT / of PLACE

think you meant begin not begone. this is three trochees followed by an iamb: THINK you / MEANT be- / GIN not / be-GONE - this could be fixed like this: i THINK / you MEANT / be-GIN / and NOT / be-GONE

I know this sucks but it was fun now you're back to iambic

and keep up the good work, seven, eight this is not iambic - and KEEP / up the GOOD / work SEV- / en EIGHT - the second foot is an anapaest. You could fix it, more or less, like this: and KEEP / the GOOD / work UP, / count SEV- / en EIGHT.

oh and feel free to use this to tell, or is it show, others what not to do. You're too hard on yourself. Try another.

have a good day Lon. You, too, Max.

sorry edit - I went down to feed the chicken after I posted this and remembered this is a ten count not eight. maybe i'll try again later There was no stipulation as to line lengths, just to write in iambic rhythm, but if you want to write IP, that's welcome, too.
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Old 04-30-2015, 01:13 PM
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I am
A man who weeps
Who wished to be a hawk
To fly inside the clouds above
To seek, and swoop, and slay the wondrous doves
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Old 04-30-2015, 04:38 PM
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Getting fancy!

Flawless iambic rhythm with the makings of a fine poem.

Consider repeating "to" rather than "and" - stronger and less run-on feel.

Well done.
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