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#1
06-20-2006, 11:02 PM
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The Coffee Shop
Here's our current menu. If you'd like to suggest for something, let us know...
Café's Menu -Beverages- ===Lemo'nade'=== The Head Chef's explosive favorite. ===The Fireball=== Well, one of our waitresses throws a fireball at you. Drink it if you can. ===Old Age Spirits=== Made in the 1500's, drunk in the 1500's, refilled and sold to you- now. ===Turtle Toe Tea=== Turtle's toes in green tea. ===Calamari Coffee=== Ground-up callamari in your favorite cup of Joe ===Rabid Bat Coffee=== Classic roast, with an exciting dash of diseased flying rodent. -Medicine Beverages- ===Alchohol-Tylenol=== Here is the concoction you've been waiting for! Rubbing Alchohal + Dirt + Tylenol + Acid + Coffee Mixed in one mighty brew, and steamed to perfection! ===Dog Bog=== Highly concentrated doggy ear medicine, mixed with paint thinner and a piece of dry ice. Not for dogs, it will kill them. ===Meat Shake=== You name it, we got it: in the blender of course! Dog meat, cat meat, racoon meat, baboon meat, frog meat, fox meat, beaver meat, penguin meat... so many choices! Blended with 10 different meats and powerful pain killers -Main Courses- ===Clammy Chowder=== Served cold. Might be frozen. Contains unknown radioactive ingredients. ===Magical Paste=== Made of drywall, lime, beer, ricotta cheese, and pale orange juice. It cleanses the mind! !Be sure to look for a bonus drywall on the side! ===Burnt Soup=== Tastes just like steak, basking in the raw heat of the sun for three years. ===Pigeon and Monkey Musical=== A massive mixture of fresh pigeon and monkey roadkill. Can be served with one of the two dressing- Motor Oil, Liquid Nitrogen ===Sulferic Acid Shrimp=== Shrimp cooked in pure sulfuric acid. It might taste good, if you still have a tongue after eating it. ===Smiley Pancakes=== Piss-filled bread, shaped in a circle and topped with poison ivy. Does NOT look like a smiley face. -Side Courses- ===Scales=== Like chips. Only hard, salty, and disgusting. ===Feces=== Everyone knows what these choclatey treats are... ===Fingers=== Your choice of fingers from monkeys, gorillas, humans, or sloths. Sloth fingers may take longer than the rest to get to you. ===Toest=== Not a misspelling. Everybody's favourite appendage, served up crispy and buttered! Available with or without nail. -Pastries & Desserts- ===Mucus Cake=== With your choice of a juicy, rotten tomato filling, or a tangy, worm filling. -Is always served with mucus frosting- ==='Bone'ana Split=== Two raw, rotten pig bones placed in a cracked stone bowl from the Caveman Era! Includes your choice of frozen bile, or disease infested feces. ===Circular Surprise!=== A thick piece of dryed out chalk, stuffed and chilled with raw salmon. ===Doughnuts=== ...with blood frosting ...with extra fingernail sprinkles ...chef's special ===Assorted Danish=== (with blood frosting) All employees: Oasis Writer - Big Man, Foreseer of all things awesome, Virgin Hunter, Mafia King! Wisp - Head Chef, Inventor of New and Brilliant Foods Dephere - Waitress with a bright smile, Café Hermit, Assistant Manager Titania - Corrupt Health Inspector, Waitress, Awesomous Dudette Mr. Murder - Permanent Virgin...I mean trainee....yeah.... Apply as you see fit Enjoy!
__________________
Founder: To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Personal site: To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Please critique other's work before asking to get critique on your own. Last edited by Winterbite; 02-08-2009 at 04:39 PM.. Reason: Adding to the Menu :) 
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#2
06-20-2006, 11:03 PM
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wow.. this place has character
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A Girl in Winter. His lips parted, cracked and dry as he struggled to whisper: "My muse, you're here."
She simply smiled, "Yes, Drake, I am here."
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#3
06-20-2006, 11:05 PM
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*Takes a breather* Okay...a new place to go insane
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#4
06-20-2006, 11:06 PM
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Oasis I used your menu, hope you don't mind.
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#5
06-20-2006, 11:06 PM
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do we have to have insanity?
__________________
A Girl in Winter. His lips parted, cracked and dry as he struggled to whisper: "My muse, you're here."
She simply smiled, "Yes, Drake, I am here."
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#6
06-20-2006, 11:06 PM
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*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG*INSANITY* OMFGS OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG
spam spam spam onnly I can do this, thanks.
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#7
06-20-2006, 11:07 PM
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Used a little too much *points at the bottom of it*
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#8
06-20-2006, 11:09 PM
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Updated?
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#9
06-20-2006, 11:11 PM
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bwahahah - Sure. That's fine I guess. I like being the Big Man
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#10
06-20-2006, 11:12 PM
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bad bad Ninja.. no spam!
__________________
A Girl in Winter. His lips parted, cracked and dry as he struggled to whisper: "My muse, you're here."
She simply smiled, "Yes, Drake, I am here."
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#11
06-20-2006, 11:13 PM
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Umm....I feel like I should start out with something deep....
"We are not limited by the size of our mind, but the breadth of our imagination." How's that for an entrance....
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#12
06-20-2006, 11:14 PM
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 Are we under attack? *grabs shotgun* I'm safe....not sure about the rest of you.
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#13
06-20-2006, 11:16 PM
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And if I am bribed, I will make gumbos, etoufees, and select boiled crustaceans (shrimp, crab. crawfish).
This place is awesome.
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#14
06-20-2006, 11:17 PM
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That was quoting me, BTW....just so you know.
I made it up, at least, but I'm hoping no one else ever said that.
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#15
06-20-2006, 11:18 PM
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I'll bribe you for the seafood Jay, that sounds good right now. And I think I read that on the back of my Kix box once Dephy.
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#16
06-20-2006, 11:20 PM
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Well I have rum and my first mate I'm happy...
__________________
A Girl in Winter. His lips parted, cracked and dry as he struggled to whisper: "My muse, you're here."
She simply smiled, "Yes, Drake, I am here."
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#17
06-20-2006, 11:22 PM
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No you didn't, Oasis. *continues to eat Kix*
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#18
06-20-2006, 11:23 PM
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I'm glad your happy Beth
...we so need an alian smile...do we have one???....wow, that's random......Oh....sorry Dephere, was mistaken
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#19
06-20-2006, 11:24 PM
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Now it's time for me to delve into getting just a few more listings....
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#20
06-20-2006, 11:25 PM
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Have fun Jay
As for me...I'm tired....*(wow)* So, good night all.
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#21
06-20-2006, 11:25 PM
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why an alien?
__________________
A Girl in Winter. His lips parted, cracked and dry as he struggled to whisper: "My muse, you're here."
She simply smiled, "Yes, Drake, I am here."
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#22
06-20-2006, 11:27 PM
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I hit colon twice, so it looked like a smily with four eyes. like - :
Reminded me of an alian.Err.... : : D without the spaces
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To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Last edited by Oasis Writer; 06-20-2006 at 11:27 PM.. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
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#23
06-20-2006, 11:29 PM
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I'm an alien people.
That's my secret.
__________________
Founder: To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Personal site: To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Please critique other's work before asking to get critique on your own.
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#24
06-20-2006, 11:31 PM
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Mmm, cafes. Even though I just spent a week in Seattle I still crave coffee...
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I’ve come to believe that I’m at my best and that it’s a beautiful world when my feelings are like the weather and that what I think is not my business. -Mark Vonnegut
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#25
06-20-2006, 11:31 PM
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*gasp*
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#26
06-20-2006, 11:33 PM
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I bet its not thats the throw you off the scent..
he's really a pirate!
__________________
A Girl in Winter. His lips parted, cracked and dry as he struggled to whisper: "My muse, you're here."
She simply smiled, "Yes, Drake, I am here."
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#27
06-20-2006, 11:34 PM
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Oh, I see now. Can we call him Morgan?
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#28
06-20-2006, 11:35 PM
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I'd never shoot him!!
when I name an officer you can call him that.
__________________
A Girl in Winter. His lips parted, cracked and dry as he struggled to whisper: "My muse, you're here."
She simply smiled, "Yes, Drake, I am here."
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#29
06-20-2006, 11:36 PM
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...*gets a brilliant idea*
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#30
06-20-2006, 11:36 PM
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Arr, Pirates unite!
__________________
I’ve come to believe that I’m at my best and that it’s a beautiful world when my feelings are like the weather and that what I think is not my business. -Mark Vonnegut
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