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Tinmen Part 7 (Adult language and themes, violence)

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Old 01-23-2013, 05:46 PM
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Icon1 Tinmen Part 7 (Adult language and themes, violence)


This is a science fiction romance. There is adult language and themes. IF I include a love scene, it will likely be alluded to when posted here, but edited out, and I may decide to post just the deleted scene in the Adult Content forum.

Roughly 1,800 words

Part 1 is here: http://www.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=43517
Part 2 is here: http://www.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=43518
Part 3 is here: http://www.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=43529
Part 4 is here: http://www.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=43673
Part 5 is here: http://www.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=43713
Part 6 is here: http://www.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=43797

(In part 1: We were 'introduced' to a cyborg, who does not know who he was/is. We also met a lab technician named Kat who was working on him. As well as another man name Jack, who is Kat's significant other.
In part 2: Kat discovers that the cyborg is not like other cyborgs and could be one of the first successful attempts at creating cyborgs. We also meet ex-Warrant Officer Maximilian Smeede.
In part 3: After trying to render the cyborg harmless, we learn that he will die if he is not returned to the dangerous armor, but it is decided that he will be left to die.
In part 4: The base has been attacked, Kat and others taken away as prisoners and Jack puts the cyborg back into his armor, before Jack dies.
In part 5: Our cyborg infiltrates an enemy base and finds an ally.
In part 6: Our cyborg learns his name, and rescues members of the resistance, including Kat, but is once again in the hands of the UANM.)


____ Two days later his chance came to simply walk away. He had found his way into the Delta Duty Assignment Roster and could have easily changed his post with one of those being sent out on recon. He was in the process of doing so, but it wasn't straight forward, he had to swap out with other cyborgs that were not currently on duty, which there were few of, and he had to pay attention to location. A cyborg off duty but thirty miles from the base would raise questions if it suddenly started walking away. Hopping his way from post to post, shifting cyborgs around so that no one would notice their movements brought his designation into a post he had thought nothing of, until data began to flood into him. Waste Management was the name of the post. It should have stuck out like a sore thumb, after all why would they assign such capable and expensive hardware to Waste Management. Resistance Infiltration would have been a better name, but that too would have stood out to prying eyes, like his.
____ It didn't take him long to realize that Trident Corp had a new line of cyborgs, ones without armor, without the subsurface neural mesh. He followed that trail to some of the reports made by the five new cyborgs, they read like humans speak, complete with misspelled words and improper grammar, opinions and emotions. Brags' blood ran cold. They were at least semi-autonomous. The resistance had to be warned. The new cyborgs had to be identified. He dug through the files but invariably he ran into clearance issues.
____ Thinking it over, he reasoned that if he found a way to contact the resistance to warn them about the cyborgs that looked and acted human, without more detailed information, it might force the hand of the cyborgs. If they began a systematic search for cyborgs, they still might not find them before the cyborgs could flee, before they could call in strikes against the resistance. No, he needed to be able to give the resistance names, descriptions, images.
____ Brags began searching for transport to Fort Mickelson, where he could enter the Waste Management roster and report for duty. An escort detail would leave for Fort Mickelson in four days, he would be a part of it.


____ Brags was growing frustrated. He had been at his new post for a week and still he had not been able to uncover more data about the new cyborgs. His 'kind' were not allowed into many areas and he had not found a place where he could jack in to their system that would grant him any greater clearance than he already had. Time was running out, if it had not already, he grumbled to himself. It was past time for more aggressive action. He knew where the mainframe was housed. No more passive intelligence gathering, he was going in hot.
____ On his way to the mainframe, he walked through one of the many arms fabrication chambers, up high on an extra wide catwalk, the hot metal, clanking and grinding machines far below. There was a line of armored cyborgs ahead of him, he moved up behind them and watched as at the other end of the line they were being fitted with a new chain gun, the mounts for it were hot bonded to their armor. It would be useful to him, such a large caliber weapon, especially since he intended to get in to the mainframe in whatever fashion he could, not to mention that getting back out would probably be one hell of a fight.
____ A woman stood close to the far end of the line, document viewer in hand, checking each cyborg as it stepped up for the new weapon. The automated arms were shifting and whirring as they handled the hot metal, grasping each cyborg's arm and bonding the mounts.
____ It took him a while but Brags found his way into her device to add his designation to her list.
____ As a cyborg stepped away from the machine, one of the automated arms stuck to it, the cyborg did not slow. The arm came free, swinging backwards farther than it should.
____ She only had time to suck in a breath before she was tumbling backwards over the railing, her document device falling away, but her fall was arrested. Brags had seen the arm snapping back towards her, seen that she had her head down, the incoming danger beyond her awareness. For only an instant he had thought to yell out a warning, but two strides and he was close enough to lurch sideways, past the cyborg in front of him and towards the rail. He snagged her from the air, the machinery fifty feet below denied a second victim, her document viewer smashed to flying bits. Lifting her easily back up over the rail he set her down. She clutched her arm, there would be a mark where he had grabbed her, and she stared at him wide eyed, a little blood dribbled from her forehead where the automated arm had struck her. Leaving the line, Brags simply continued on his way, silently cursing himself for having saved her. It wasn't because she was one of them, one of the enemy, or because he would not be getting the chain gun, but because he knew his programming didn't include spontaneous heroism. Cyborgs only safeguarded life when they were specifically assigned to do so. His cover may just have been blown and he still did not have the information he needed to save the lives of so many others.


____ She watched him go, her hand coming up to feel her forehead, getting a little lightheaded at the sight of her own blood. Her eyes drifted up, drawn to the normally panning camera that had stopped, pointed at her, then watched as it and other cameras turned to follow the unusual cyborg. “Control,” she too watched the cyborg go, “We have a cyborg that is acting in a fashion inconsistent with its programming. Please advise.”


____ When he cleared the fabrication chamber, he saw no one, but cameras watched him. “Shit,” he turned at the first hallway, moving in the opposite direction from the mainframe. If he made it clear of this, he didn't need them beefing up security around the place. Stepping out into another hallway he came to a halt. Arranged in a semi-circle in front of him were six cyborgs, five of them with large caliber arms that were mounted on their backs, the two barrels stuck out over their shoulders, one on each side. Despite the new armor, he knew they could cut him to shreds. But what held his attention was the cyborg in the middle, the one without the portable cannons. Instead of the black face shield, his was clear, and he knew that face, though he could not have said how, when or why, nor could he come up with a name.
____ Commands came to him via the network connection, Brags followed them to the letter, his fast access to his internal data supplying him with the differences between human to human soldier commands and commands for cyborgs. Despite his recognition of the familiar cyborg, Brags felt his heart sink, his hand was likely played out. Finding another ally in his time of need and vulnerability was too much to hope for.


____ When the technician removed his helm, the familiar cyborg gasped, just a little, upon seeing his face.
____ “I'll be damned. Brags,” the cyborg said to the technician.
____ Frowning at the other cyborg, the technician raised a brow at him, “Beg your pardon?”
____ Letting his eyes front gaze shift to the other cyborg, he lock stares with him, causing the other cyborg's eyes to widen.
____ The cyborg raised his weapon arm and pointed it at him, “Step away, Taylor,” he moved the technician aside and came up close, the business end of his weapon pressing against Brags' throat, angle up perfectly. One shot would blow Brags brain stem to bits, along with the more important wetchips and modules.
____ There wasn't anything he could do, he was locked into a device designed to hold a malfunctioning cyborg perfectly still.
____ “Convince me you aren't following programming and you might survive,” the other cyborg commanded grimly.
____ “How do you propose I do that?” Brags asked.
____ “Start with telling me who you are.”
____ “I can only repeat what I read from my service record. I have no memory of my life before.”
____ That brought a frown to the other cyborg's face.
____ Taylor watched, looking a little mystified, “What's going on here? Is it a rogue or not?”
____ “You better tell me something or I am going to terminate you.”
____ “You want me to make shit up?” Brags asked in frustration.
____ “WHOA! You are not going to terminate anything in here!” Taylor snapped, talking over what Brags had said.
____ “Five. Four. ...” the weapon charged up.
____ Taylor yelled frantically, “Lieutenant Hopper! STOP!”
____ It felt like someone had stuck him in a blender and he was being slung around.
____ “Two. ...”
____ “Chops,” Brags said quietly, his eyes clamped closed, brow drawn as memories flitted by, “Mardi,” he growled and shook his head as the memories fled, leaving him with just two names, two faces. He knew he looked at Lincoln “Chops” Hopper, when he opened his eyes, the countdown had stopped.
____ Hopper smiled and nodded, but his weapon stayed where it was, “That'll do for a start. They said that if you didn't 'wake up' in the first few weeks that you never would, so what happened?”
____ “I got the back of my skull blown off. I'm treading water here, throw me a line. I woke up, didn't know anything about what had happened, I thought I would be destroyed if I let anyone know I wasn't with the program any more,” Brags answered, then inwardly winced.
____ “Why would you think that?” Chops asked.
____ “Everyone who looked like me was a brainless hunk of metal. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that a puppet is easier to control and predict than a person. Besides, I can't say that I am thrilled about what's been done to me. It's better than the scrap heap, but the thought of going back to being like one of them,” he looked at one of the cyborgs with the black face shields, “Naw, man, I'd rather be dead.”
____ The weapon dropped away, Chops stepped back, “Sedate him,” he said to Taylor before walking away.

---

Tinmen 8 is here: http://www.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=43883

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Old 01-25-2013, 11:46 PM
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MiMo,
Good episode but I have questions that you might not want to answer if they spoil the story for me and the rest of the readers. If that's the case, just tell me-patience!

Ok, this isn't one of them:
Brags found his way into her device to add his designation to her list...is this some kind of double-entendre? whoo, steamy stuff

This is:
Did you establish that Brags is incapable of existing outside his armor or was it only because his former condition(freshly wounded) required the armor until he healed?

I wasn't quite sure if you were portraying Chops as one of the neo-cyborgs, is he of the infiltrator class?

Regardless of whether you should tell me those answers, the story's still flowing. I like the moral situation with Brags facing exposure yet choosing to save "the enemy", it kind of reminds me of the phrase written in my signature.

Consistency of character, nice way of representing!

Be seeing you here and there,
Abdula
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Old 01-26-2013, 06:29 AM
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Obviously a lot going on here. It is difficult to pick up the thread of all that has occurred previously but it was a good and interesting read. The writing is top drawer.
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Old 01-26-2013, 07:36 AM
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Abdula,

lol @ steamy stuff!

I see my decision not to launch into a narrator exposition on cyborgs early on is coming back to haunt me. lol Nice catch. You are right, that is what I established... I attempted to leave the explanation as to why Brags can survive outside of his armor up to the few lines about him being a prototype for the Alpha series.
I may decide to slip this info in somewhere:
Trident Corp's original idea was to have the cyborgs capable of surviving outside of their armor, but the limited power supply in the fuel cells they could implant in the cyborgs, combined with the amount of draw that the hardware called for, made this impractical. They played around with rechargeable cells (charged by the armor) and settled on a system that would ultimately preserve the data, but not the person/cyborg... at least not for any long period of time. The idea was for maintenance, not out-of-armor functioning.

Brags, as a prototype, has extra fuel cells that the production models did not get, he also has run levels that shut down more of the modules drawing on his power, as well as some bypasses to allow the body to take over when a module is shut down or damaged. Like his enhanced hearing. It can be shut down and bypassed. lol Since his control module was shot off, he did not know how to shut things down... he actually could have survived outside of his armor longer if he had known and shut things down.

It is a lot of detailed information to try to casually slip in. lol I may add a line from Kat about extra fuel cells and see how it fits.

As for Chops... I think installment 8 should answer your questions, but just to be clear, Chops look like a cyborg, with visible neural-mesh.

Thank you again, and as always, for your insight, questions and suggestions!
MM

Edit: Oops, also forgot to comment on Chops being out of armor (which you will see later, installment 8.) Again, prototype, though of a different series... but also improvement in the fuel cells and decreased load. Chops has to recharge, but not as often as the production model cyborgs that we have met thus far.
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Old 01-26-2013, 07:37 AM
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oldron,

Thank you very much for the compliment! If you choose to read the other installments, I hope they do not disappoint!

MM
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Old 02-01-2013, 06:24 PM
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____ Thinking it over, he reasoned that if he found a way to contact the resistance to warn them about the cyborgs that looked and acted human, without more detailed information, it might force the hand of the cyborgs. If they began a systematic search for cyborgs, they still might not find them before the cyborgs could flee, before they could call in strikes against the resistance. No, he needed to be able to give the resistance names, descriptions, images.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've seen the new bond flick, I'm on board ...
____ Brags began searching for transport to Fort Mickelson, where he could enter the Waste Management roster and report for duty. An escort detail would leave for Fort Mickelson in four days, he would be a part of it.

Love how he's pimping the system. Trident corp has no idea!




____ A woman stood close to the far end of the line, document viewer in hand, is it the apple document viewer? that company has really dropped the ball lately with the names. checking each cyborg as it stepped up for the new weapon. The automated arms were shifting and whirring as they handled the hot metal, grasping each cyborg's arm and bonding the mounts.
____ It took him a while but Brags found his way into her device to add his designation to her list.

wi-fi? maybe a little more detail. Maybe something like information flashing before his eyes, losing himself in another world, one of numbers and code ...

____ She only had time to suck in a breath before she was tumbling backwards over the railing, her document device falling away, but her fall was arrested. Brags had seen the arm snapping back towards her, seen that she had her head down, the incoming danger beyond her awareness. For only an instant he had thought to yell out a warning, but two strides and he was close enough to lurch sideways, past the cyborg in front of him and towards the rail. He snagged her from the air, the machinery fifty feet below denied a second victim, her document viewer smashed to flying bits. Lifting her easily back up over the rail he set her down. She clutched her arm, there would be a mark where he had grabbed her, and she stared at him wide eyed, a little blood dribbled from her forehead where the automated arm had struck her. Leaving the line, Brags simply continued on his way, silently cursing himself for having saved her. It wasn't because she was one of them, one of the enemy, or because he would not be getting the chain gun, but because he knew his programming didn't include spontaneous heroism. Awesome. Line. Award. Cyborgs only safeguarded life when they were specifically assigned to do so. His cover may just have been blown and he still did not have the information he needed to save the lives of so many others.











____ “You better tell me something or I am going to terminate you.”
____ “You want me to make shit up?” Brags asked in frustration.




Gotta respect the man's committment to the resistance. But I miss the dynamic between what's her name and Brags. It was such a big part of the story initially.

But at the same time it's good to see the world opening up a little.
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Old 02-02-2013, 09:24 AM
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Rooster,

Another good catch, thank you! Yeah, I sorta skimmed over the document viewer part, I will plump that puppy up a little.

MM
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