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Early Morning at the Lake

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  #1  
Old 01-28-2012, 04:59 AM
KBR (Offline)
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Default Early Morning at the Lake


the early morning mist
floats upon the lake
where quiet stillness holds its sway
and all around the bank
the dark still clings to every tree
and cold is sinking down
to settle in dark holes
in order to escape the coming day

but the glory of the star
that lights our open sky
is edging out the night

the shallow beams of early dawn
are gently touching the still water
and mist is rising up the shafts
to return to open air
the place from whence it came
where it waits upon the evening
and the coolness of the night
to descend again and ghost on darkness waters

but the warming golden rays
have stirred an early morning zephyr
that plays upon the water
drawing swirling paisley patterns
that appear and go away
like fairies shy of humans in their wood

in the early quiet stillness
a pair of mourning doves
are softly cooing from a tree
and bidding gentle night
a heartfelt fair thee well

I deftly lob my bobber
into a quiet patch of water
and wait for nothing whatsoever
but a day of catching sunlight
and perhaps some easy slumber
and a peace that comes from sitting at this lake


Last edited by KBR; 01-28-2012 at 05:06 AM..
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Old 01-28-2012, 05:13 AM
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KBR
This is better than bacon for breakfast. I really like it. Would suggest losing ---upon---. It has an unpleasant whiff to it that doesn't fit the scene.

Great to see your work and thanks again for the help.
R.
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Old 01-28-2012, 05:51 AM
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Thanks R! Life's been busy. But for me, nothing's better than bacon for breakfast. I bet they make fantastic bacon in the Southwest! Thanks again!

Originally Posted by Waterpoor View Post
KBR
This is better than bacon for breakfast. I really like it. Would suggest losing ---upon---. It has an unpleasant whiff to it that doesn't fit the scene.

Great to see your work and thanks again for the help.
R.
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Old 01-28-2012, 07:00 AM
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Lovely imagery as always. I really like the first verse, with the references to the cold and dark.
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  #5  
Old 02-01-2012, 01:07 AM
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This is a truly poetic and beautiful piece. I love the images you create. This part is just one of my favorites... so much of it is exceptional, but I'll pick this:

the dark still clings to every tree
and cold is sinking down
to settle in dark holes
in order to escape the coming day
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Old 02-01-2012, 01:40 AM
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Hey KBR,
a lovely reflective piece made eloquent by the simplicity of the prose. It conjures up its subject perfectly. Excellent work, especially enjoyed the last stanza, think I'll go fishing tomorrow.
Best regards
D
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Old 02-01-2012, 04:43 AM
KBR (Offline)
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I'm glad you like Ethan. My lake gets me through rough times. No matter the weight I carry, I feel sliding off by the end of the first 10 minutes. Thanks again!
Originally Posted by Ethan Blake View Post
Hey KBR,
a lovely reflective piece made eloquent by the simplicity of the prose. It conjures up its subject perfectly. Excellent work, especially enjoyed the last stanza, think I'll go fishing tomorrow.
Best regards
D
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Old 02-01-2012, 04:44 AM
KBR (Offline)
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Thanks Phyllis! I appreciate the comments!!

Originally Posted by Phyllis Stewart View Post
This is a truly poetic and beautiful piece. I love the images you create. This part is just one of my favorites... so much of it is exceptional, but I'll pick this:

the dark still clings to every tree
and cold is sinking down
to settle in dark holes
in order to escape the coming day
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