WritersBeat.com
 

Go Back   WritersBeat.com > Write Here > Poetry > Lyrics

Lyrics Put the writing to the "beat"!


"The Hook"

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 03-11-2010, 07:24 AM
prenticeparton's Avatar
prenticeparton (Offline)
Intellectually Fertile
Official Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Pacific Beach, California
Posts: 172
Thanks: 1
Thanks 4
Default "The Hook"


Just another tune that I have written. As always, love your feedback.
Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Leave it on the surface, we need our hook
Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Fed and full of purpose, we’re hungry for the hook.

What are you trying to say here
It has to be repeated
We’ve experienced the buildup
The premise is needed

Our eager minds only hold on to catchy phrases
Forget the rodents we are lost in the mazes
Of this hookless tune

Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Leave it on the surface, we need our hook
Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Fed and full of purpose, we’re hungry for the hook.

We are sinking ever deeper
Grasping for our life vests
We’re the fish without the coral
The birds without nests

Our eager ears are open and ready,
Leave meandering to the birds, we’re steady
On path for the ever delivering hook

Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Leave it on the surface, we need our hook
Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Fed and full of purpose, we’re hungry for the hook.

Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Leave it on the surface, we need our hook
Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Fed and full of purpose, we’re hungry for the hook.

There has to be more than this now

Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Leave it on the surface, we need our hook
Where’s the hook, where’s the hook
Fed and full of purpose, we’re hungry for the hook.

__________________
The pleasures of the damned are limited to brief moments of happiness” - Charles Bukowski

Last edited by prenticeparton; 03-11-2010 at 08:54 AM..
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 03-12-2010, 07:26 AM
Redlorry
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default

I like it, the chorus is really catchy, I am even singing it to myself after reading it, although of course I have no musical talent and am (rudely) told my children I can't sing!

For some reason quotes wont work properly so I've done it the old fashioned away, But I love this verse in particular, the comparisons are brilliant!

"We are sinking ever deeper
Grasping for our life vests
We’re the fish without the coral
The birds without nests"

Yep - I really like it!
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 03-12-2010, 10:00 AM
prenticeparton's Avatar
prenticeparton (Offline)
Intellectually Fertile
Official Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Pacific Beach, California
Posts: 172
Thanks: 1
Thanks 4
Default

Thank you very much for your feedback. I wrote this when stressing out over finding a hook for another song that I was writing. Naturally, I wrote an entire song that is about finding the hook. I enjoy the irony in it.

Thanks, again, for the feedback!
__________________
The pleasures of the damned are limited to brief moments of happiness” - Charles Bukowski
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 03-19-2010, 11:11 PM
HavocZephyr (Offline)
Let me introduce myself
New Author
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 8
Thanks: 1
Thanks 0
Default

I agree with Redlorry here, the chorus is quite "grappling" so to speak. it works its repetitive nature in your mind and you just can't help but repeat it. the song plays so well on the psyche of the mind I like it alot
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 03-23-2010, 06:54 AM
prenticeparton's Avatar
prenticeparton (Offline)
Intellectually Fertile
Official Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Pacific Beach, California
Posts: 172
Thanks: 1
Thanks 4
Default

thank you very much!
__________________
The pleasures of the damned are limited to brief moments of happiness” - Charles Bukowski
Reply With Quote
Reply

  WritersBeat.com > Write Here > Poetry > Lyrics


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Prompt #33 - In Loving Memory: "The Cloying Nature of Hope" ouiouilee Prompts & Challenges 5 02-24-2010 12:31 PM
The start of "The Book" WildRose43 Free Writing 5 11-04-2009 10:08 AM
"The Voice From the Skies" - Working Title! What a Sight Lyrics 1 06-29-2009 02:52 PM
Fiction Story, "The Strong Girl Mark Vidal Fiction 2 06-04-2009 08:23 AM
Is the show "The Bachelor" really a reality show? peteyflow Non-Fiction 4 01-24-2009 05:05 PM


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 01:08 PM.

vBulletin, Copyright © 2000-2006, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.