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Old 08-01-2018, 12:06 PM
Vince (Offline)
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“You know, getting old isn’t hard all you have to do is wait. You don’t even have to pay attention. It just happens.” Jim said to Mack as they were sitting on the exercise machines in the Rec. Center.


Mack, everyone called him Mack, just looked at Jim for a moment and then said, “Yep, getting old is easy if you don’t die of some sickness or stupidity.”


“Being old that is the hard part.” Jim went on.



“You know being irrelevant, invisible or worst of all cute.”


Mack nodded his head knowingly and said with a wrinkled forehead, “Of course, the problem with being a cute person is over time you become chronic.


Jim laughed and said, “If I wasn’t so tired I’d give you a smack for a pun like that. I don’t care that you were a shrink.”


“Well” said Mack, “If you could find the energy to smack me I’d have to take it but would forget why you were hitting me.”


“Why would I hit you?” asked Jim raising his eye brows in mock surprise.


They both laughed even though this routine was a daily occurrence with the dialog differing only slightly each time. Age and the sharing of it made them comrades. The time they spent together was prized by them due to the comfort of not having to explain anything.
Affection is the enemy of the aged. It creates a bond and interdependence that will be permanently torn away without warning. So rough house humor was the only kind of closeness that was acceptable.



Both men had been married for over forty years. That love and intimacy was tough enough. Whether their wives or they died mattered little because either’s death would kill their life together. Knowing this truth the men fought to keep each other at arm’s length.
They were old when they first met. Who they both were was carved on the stone of their lives. But on their first meeting at the center they knew the comfort of a friendship that required no explanations and needed no apologies.
Old men can be generous with their acceptance of the difference of others. It required little and loneliness was the only victim.
All of this played though Mack’s mind as he stood on Jim’s grave. The loss of his friend was only real there. Everywhere else he just felt like he was waiting for Jim to show up.
He turned away and left for home. He eyes moist but there were no tears. Men of his generation did not know how to cry.

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Old 08-01-2018, 05:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Vince View Post
“You know, getting old isn’t hard all you have to do is wait. You don’t even have to pay attention. It just happens.” Jim said to Mack as they were sitting on the exercise machines in the Rec. Center.


Mack, everyone called him Mack, just looked at Jim for a moment and then said, “Yep, getting old is easy if you don’t die of some sickness or stupidity.”


“Being old that is the hard part.” Jim went on.



“You know being irrelevant, invisible or worst of all cute.”


Mack nodded his head knowingly and said with a wrinkled forehead, “Of course, the problem with being a cute person is over time you become chronic.


Jim laughed and said, “If I wasn’t so tired I’d give you a smack for a pun like that. I don’t care that you were a shrink.”


“Well” said Mack, “If you could find the energy to smack me I’d have to take it but would forget why you were hitting me.”


“Why would I hit you?” asked Jim raising his eye brows in mock surprise.


They both laughed even though this routine was a daily occurrence with the dialog differing only slightly each time. Age and the sharing of it made them comrades. The time they spent together was prized by them due to the comfort of not having to explain anything.
Affection is the enemy of the aged. It creates a bond and interdependence that will be permanently torn away without warning. So rough house humor was the only kind of closeness that was acceptable.



Both men had been married for over forty years. That love and intimacy was tough enough. Whether their wives or they died mattered little because either’s death would kill their life together. Knowing this truth the men fought to keep each other at arm’s length.
They were old when they first met. Who they both were was carved on the stone of their lives. But on their first meeting at the center they knew the comfort of a friendship that required no explanations and needed no apologies.
Old men can be generous with their acceptance of the difference of others. It required little and loneliness was the only victim.
All of this played though Mack’s mind as he stood on Jim’s grave. The loss of his friend was only real there. Everywhere else he just felt like he was waiting for Jim to show up.
He turned away and left for home. He eyes moist but there were no tears. Men of his generation did not know how to cry.


This is so good I had to sign in so I could say so.

Thanks a lot you sunnuva ... you know.
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Old 08-01-2018, 05:06 PM
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From "They both laughed..." And on delete. Use their interactions to show this. Avoid summarizing for your reader.

I like this a lot, has a good chance of being something if you concentrate on character.

Eitger speech tag or action, no need for both,

Develope the characters, this could be a really good story. I know it is just free writing, but I think youve got a good idea here.
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Old 08-02-2018, 10:48 AM
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thnks Nick glad you got it. it takes an SOB to know one and we can share nice
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Old 08-02-2018, 10:51 AM
Vince (Offline)
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Thanks for reading and suggestions daes13. it was just free writtingbut I think I'll give it more time. Not sure what you mean by Eitger speech tag or action
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Old 08-10-2018, 04:07 PM
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so good. really hit the sweet spot! men crying is sometimes hot
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Old 08-15-2018, 08:57 AM
Vince (Offline)
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HI Box,
Very glad you liked it. Men cryall the time - its just on the inside. Hot? Hmmm Ithink I am tearing up right now. Nope just tired eyes.
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