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It was a sturdy barn

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  #1  
Old 07-21-2015, 07:39 PM
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Default It was a sturdy barn


Built of logs, not boards
Built to endure russian winters

Windows higher than your head
Slit like, the thickness of a log

They were crowded and crammed in there
Men, Women, Children

All the villagers who were caught

Yelling, screaming, crying
Terror swirling in the air

Their captors told the men and women
"You may leave through this one window"

"Not children- children stay inside"

A few adults came out
one with a child
the child was tossed back in

Then grenades were tossed in
(some call them potato mashers)

Explosions, smoke, screaming- screaming

Now
bottles of flammable liquid
hurled, breaking, soaking the wood

And the screaming

Then
men
with flamethrowers
hosing fire onto the structure

Hell on Earth

Inferno Incarnate

The screaming

Gunfire begins
Rifles- machine guns- pistols

The roar of the flames
The banging of weapons
The smoke
The laughter of the assailants
(do daemons make war to move amongst men?)

and

no more

screaming



Later
one of the leaders
quoted as saying
"The children- if you don't get the children
it starts all over again"



All of this happened. Historic fact.



"Humanity has already committed every stupidity and baseness."
"Now it only repeats them."
Those lines were spoken in
Andrei Tarkovsky's film
"Andrei Rublev"
set in 1408


5 centuries before the barn burned

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Through the smoke and fog there comes a form ... shape shifting ... could this be the Future?

Last edited by Nick Pierce; 07-22-2015 at 02:27 AM..
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  #2  
Old 07-24-2015, 09:36 PM
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Awful and wonderful Nick. Brutal, vivid, a peeling back of the mask all rolled into a powerful statement. My favorite poem of yours ever.
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Old 07-25-2015, 02:50 AM
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When it's all over I hope to find that demons do exist. Otherwise I have to believe humans are capable of such things.

Seems like 5 should be spelled.
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Old 07-25-2015, 03:38 AM
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Originally Posted by KBR View Post
Awful and wonderful Nick. Brutal, vivid, a peeling back of the mask all rolled into a powerful statement. My favorite poem of yours ever.

we must bring our own light to the darkness

thus typed Bukowski

Last edited by Nick Pierce; 07-25-2015 at 04:21 AM..
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Old 07-25-2015, 03:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Prodigalson View Post
When it's all over I hope to find that demons do exist. Otherwise I have to believe humans are capable of such things.

Seems like 5 should be spelled.

Yes, 5 should be spelled out.

I used the numeral because of it's right angles.
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Old 07-25-2015, 09:16 AM
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A perfect reason.
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 07-25-2015, 11:57 AM
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Originally Posted by Prodigalson View Post
A perfect reason.
Yeah, and here I was thinkin' I would be the only person to perceive the soft yielding shapes presented to the eye by 1 2 3 4 6 7 8 and 9.

Although, admittedly, 4 does have a couple of acute angles it was the uncompromising decisiveness of 9O degrees that sold me on using 5 for this piece of irredeemable activity enacted by mankind.

Also, of course, it was five centuries not four.
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Old 07-25-2015, 11:51 PM
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Sam Smith's 'Stay with me' was playing on my Ipod while I was reading this.

Oh wow, the emotions.
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Old 07-26-2015, 05:51 AM
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Originally Posted by LeWriter View Post
Sam Smith's 'Stay with me' was playing on my Ipod while I was reading this.

Oh wow, the emotions.

Do you want to know the title of the film that had the scene that compelled me to write this piece?
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Old 07-26-2015, 09:43 AM
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Originally Posted by Nick Pierce View Post
Also, of course, it was five centuries not four.
That's a pretty good reason, too.

Originally Posted by Nick Pierce View Post
Do you want to know the title of the film that had the scene that compelled me to write this piece?
Yes, I do.
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 07-26-2015, 10:11 AM
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[QUOTE=Prodigalson

Yes, I do.

[/QUOTE]


Come and See
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Old 07-26-2015, 10:39 AM
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I will check it out.
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 07-26-2015, 03:06 PM
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From the documentaries I’ve seen the Nazis seemed to have done this quite a lot especially in Russia and the Baltic states. I think I’m right in saying that this is where the death squads started to mass murder Jews and put into practise the idea of the ‘Final Solution’. Apparently the SS complained that it was having a detrimental effect on the morale of officers and wanted a method of killing that was more humane: for the murders that is, not the victims. Then came the gas chambers.


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Old 07-26-2015, 05:14 PM
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Originally Posted by Nick Pierce View Post
Do you want to know the title of the film that had the scene that compelled me to write this piece?

I want to know too...
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Old 07-27-2015, 02:23 AM
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Originally Posted by brianpatrick View Post
I want to know too...

Come and See
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Old 07-27-2015, 07:25 AM
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And I thought I was a sucker for depressing films....hey-soos.....
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Old 07-27-2015, 08:37 AM
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Originally Posted by LeWriter View Post
....hey-soos.....
Would that be the famous hey-soos-greese-toes ?
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Old 07-27-2015, 10:01 PM
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Originally Posted by Nick Pierce View Post
Would that be the famous hey-soos-greese-toes ?
I think you're thinking of Heemanee Chreestmose.

Or, that's his brother.

Jiminy Christmas.
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 07-27-2015, 10:18 PM
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"Built of logs, not boards
Built to endure russian winters

Windows higher than your head
Slit like, the thickness of a log"

The use of log twice in such close proximity felt awkward to me.
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Old 07-28-2015, 03:49 AM
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Originally Posted by <3Less View Post
"Built of logs, not boards
Built to endure russian winters

Windows higher than your head
Slit like, the thickness of a log"

The use of log twice in such close proximity felt awkward to me.

I also see what you see (that results in an awkward feeling).

Do you see an alternative to what we see?
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Old 07-28-2015, 04:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Nick Pierce View Post
I also see what you see (that results in an awkward feeling).

Do you see an alternative to what we see?
Sadly, I'm not quite a poet like you are, so I do not see.
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Old 07-28-2015, 04:17 PM
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Originally Posted by <3Less View Post
Sadly, I'm not quite a poet like you are, so I do not see.

Perhaps if you watched Come and See (the film that has the scene that prompted this poem) and saw the barn an alternative word would occur to you.

I toiled with tree but it seems to convey too large a piece of wood.
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Old 07-28-2015, 04:34 PM
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Originally Posted by Nick Pierce View Post
Perhaps if you watched Come and See (the film that has the scene that prompted this poem) and saw the barn an alternative word would occur to you.

I toiled with tree but it seems to convey too large a piece of wood.
Yeah, maybe. You could try beam, perhaps.
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Old 07-28-2015, 04:37 PM
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wooded limb?


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Old 07-28-2015, 07:22 PM
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Arrr!

Originally Posted by iDrew View Post
wooded limb?


xDrew
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Old 07-28-2015, 08:25 PM
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Built of unsawn timbers, stout
to withstand Russian winters...?


Upon rereading a question arose: Are you describing a window horizontal or vertical?

'Slit', to me, denotes a vertical opening, while 'slot' would more accurately portray a horizontal one which I'm assuming they were in a log structure.

Windows higher than your head
Slots, the width of a log
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Mr. Ed said I should use his signature, since he's not anymore. In honor of his good friend Nok, here it is: "As far as smoking a cigar," she said, "I'd not know where to start or how to start." "It's simple," said I, "You light one end and chew on the other and hope to meet in the middle."
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Old 07-29-2015, 02:04 AM
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Originally Posted by Prodigalson View Post

Upon rereading a question arose: Are you describing a window horizontal or vertical?

Ain't seen the film yet, eh?
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Old 07-29-2015, 02:07 AM
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Originally Posted by KBR View Post
Arrr!
As the cannon ball blew through the pirates shin he was heard to exclaim "What will I do now? I'm stumped!"
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Old 07-29-2015, 02:25 AM
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Nicely said Nick, and well put Mr Pierce. Haven't seen the movie. It's an interesting topic - what compels such inhumanity? The only answer seems to be fear.

Your delivery is good, as per usual. You've got a distinct voice that's difficult to describe. Good balance between economy and description. Nothing useful to suggest.
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Old 07-29-2015, 04:30 AM
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Originally Posted by Fernias View Post
what compels such inhumanity?
Indeed, this is the ongoing question.

Sudan/Darfur - UN estimate 300,000 dead. And the fighting/killing is happening as I type. As you read.

Yes, what compels such inhumanity?
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