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Crooked Winds

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Old 10-09-2018, 03:45 PM
Yonathan1 (Offline)
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Default Crooked Winds

Where’s the bigger picture in
that crooked 90 degree smile?

It’s supposed to be celestial white
ballgowns swaying in tumbling whirlwinds.

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Old 10-12-2018, 11:20 AM
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Where’s the bigger picture [in] drop a line?
that crooked [90 degree] smile? [] necessary, reads and flows better without. You need two more syllables here, but not any of the 4 you chose. "sneering" if you want it to be harsh... "mocking"... not sure what you're after...

It’s supposed to be celestial white- like that
ballgowns swaying in tumbling whirlwinds. - like that.
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