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Old 10-18-2015, 03:37 AM
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the night is deceptive
when the morning is receptive
active inventive
is past incentive
everything you do
the day before
you knew
comes alive
brew
so
to hope be lucky
something was happy
because time is snappy
when going back is ready

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Old 10-18-2015, 09:36 AM
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I must have read half a dozen of your poems Nacia. You seem to concentrate on the flow, a rhythym with ryme, but the meaning is evasive, or maybe I'm just thick........

and I'm still trying to get the smiley here instead of at the top of the post...so here we go again...... Ha! think I've got it.
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Old 10-18-2015, 09:45 AM
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Originally Posted by kev View Post
I must have read half a dozen of your poems Nacia. You seem to concentrate on the flow, a rhythym with ryme, but the meaning is evasive, or maybe I'm just thick........

and I'm still trying to get the smiley here instead of at the top of the post...so here we go again...... Ha! think I've got it.
hi Kev and thank you for reading
most of the time i do not know what it is I am going to put down in words
the rhyme guides me to find it

about the smiley on your right hand side in the smiles box you will find it there
or
: followed by ) does it
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Old 10-18-2015, 09:54 AM
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What a funny way to write a poem, Nacia. I first know what I want to say. The problem comes when I can't naturally feel the words to express it, then frustration sets in and I put it aside. It'll stay that way for months or sometimes years until I pick it up again and bang! It runs of my pen mostly with ease.

Now lets try your two dots and a bracket. and if it works, then heres a thankyou.
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Old 10-18-2015, 10:32 AM
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Originally Posted by Nacia View Post
hi Kev and thank you for reading
most of the time i do not know what it is I am going to put down in words
the rhyme guides me to find it
Isn't that pretty much the definition of forced rhyme?

I get flack for forced rhymes from time to time, but it is as nothing compared to the priority that you give it.

You seem to find the rhymes first and then try to figure out the meaning.
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Old 10-20-2015, 02:37 AM
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Originally Posted by Lon Palmer View Post
Isn't that pretty much the definition of forced rhyme?

I get flack for forced rhymes from time to time, but it is as nothing compared to the priority that you give it.

You seem to find the rhymes first and then try to figure out the meaning.
hi Lon and thank you for reading
yes rhyming for me helps me write what i want to say
also
i tried non rhyme and i simply cannot do it
the other thing about rhymes is that i dont need to say too much
i like small concise/few words poetry
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Old 10-20-2015, 04:29 AM
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But you seem to be sacrificing meaning for rhyme.

I think that poetic devices should enhance meaning rather than supplant it.
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