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Poetry Sit down or take a stand in this poetry section.


My Necessity:

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  #1  
Old 07-24-2014, 02:32 PM
lizariedel (Offline)
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Derived from distinguished
Serrated
Misery
And compiled by a staff
Of longing
And narcissism
Compels the heart to fly from my sleeve
And into your hands.

We whisper everythings and ignore their devolvations into less than nothings
Until our sadness cannot find its origin.

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  #2  
Old 07-24-2014, 02:35 PM
JoeMatt (Offline)
 
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WTF? 6 poems in a row? Try to show some restraint. I don't want to read them based on principle. Jesus.
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Old 07-24-2014, 02:51 PM
lizariedel (Offline)
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don't be mean. I just joined, I don't know how this stuff works.
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Old 07-24-2014, 02:58 PM
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You could have taken a little time to poke around and get a sense how things work, read the rules etc.

Otherwise, at first glance it looks like you're writing is not crap. You probably caught me at a bad time -- at a point of realization that I'm about done with this place.

Good luck -- I hope there is something here for you.
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Old 07-24-2014, 06:06 PM
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Enjoyed!
A very thought provoking piece in an expression that shows originality.
Thank you
Scott

Last edited by scottelot; 07-25-2014 at 02:13 AM..
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Old 07-26-2014, 02:23 PM
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I like the image of "serrated misery", it describes a feeling pretty well. The word "devolvation" may have been used by you intentionally though it is a made-up word. You could replace it with: devolution, dissolution or a number of other synonyms. Although poets are allowed to make up words (artistic license).
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