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Old 09-07-2015, 12:52 PM
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SoCoWordMachine (Offline)
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The writing was great as usual.

Even for a flash piece, it still felt a little incomplete to me. I felt like the little piece of plot you showed wasn't quite enough to carry the story; the characterization carried the story instead.

Maybe reveal a little more plot, so character and plot can share the weight of the story a little more evenly.
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pswgear (09-07-2015)