Thread: Steven Friday
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Old 10-22-2014, 09:03 PM
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MaliciousFriday (Offline)
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Default Steven Friday

*slightly flamboyant voice*

Oh hai thar! I'm kidding. Hello all you wonderful nobodies! I'm Steven, Steven Friday *bows*. I would like to tell you about myself.

According to the psychologist-psychiatrist-therapist guy, I am most definitely psychotic and a cynical manipulator with mild social anxiety. (I am really messed up person, huh?) I am over three-hundred years old chronologically and twenty-seven years old biologically. I like men because fuck you, that's why.

When I was still a mortal, living in San Francisco, California in my boring old apartment with my dog Vexus, I was a full-time writer who had published when I was twenty-four and became a New York Times Bestseller in the next year. Impressive, huh? Well, I had this crazy theory about the multiverse and how there is a possibility that everything I write became an alternate universe. Crazy, huh? Well guess what--it came truuuuuue. Yay me! (Too bad, as well, though. I wasn't on Earth-Prime.)

I was going out for a walk because I got bored being in my house all day. I was crossing the street and I was almost hit by a car. Instead of being thrown in the air, my character, Contagious Sunday, protected me from it and teleported me away. We conversed and he explained he doesn't know why he came to me. I asked, rather, demanded him to give me a portion of his powers and immortality. He gave it to me after much hesitation and I was a happy as a child getting a game system for Christmas. Now, you would think that I would try and use my powers for good. HAH! You're pathetic. I like being neutral. I hate taking sides because that's too much drama.

I actually stole from many banks, killed a fuckton of people just for the lawls and tried changing the world for the better by force afterwards. No one stood in my way but then things started to get hectic. People expected me to provide for them because they thought of me as a god in the modern world. A person who can summon weapons from portals and fire them at you at Mach 3 speeds should be able to provide for them? Hah! No! I actually killed off half of the population of the planet and told them all to stop consuming and wasting so much of the Earth's resources. They listened, but they also deemed me to dangerous to stay on this planet. I had to fight the world and I was almost killed. I fled from that Earth through one of my portals and I'm now trapped in this wormhole trying to find a way out.

In the meantime, I'm bored. What else do you want to know about me?

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