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Search: Posts Made By: goldengirl
Forum: Fiction 04-24-2010, 12:43 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 755
Posted By goldengirl
continuous and repetition mean the same thing...

continuous and repetition mean the same thing and you don't really need tocking ticking is enough. Motes are tiny [small particals] so you don't need tiny either. Check also that you don't repeat...
Forum: Fiction 04-24-2010, 12:31 AM
Replies: 11
Views: 1,151
Posted By goldengirl
I think you did mean that in a sexual way - it's...

I think you did mean that in a sexual way - it's a sort of balance to the pure beginning - well done
Forum: Fiction 04-22-2010, 02:42 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 740
Posted By goldengirl
many thanks for your kind words, Gwyn. I love it...

many thanks for your kind words, Gwyn. I love it when one of my stories make the reader laugh.

gg
Forum: Fiction 04-20-2010, 10:11 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,404
Posted By goldengirl
well written story - maybe not that original. But...

well written story - maybe not that original. But it does depict in a subtle way, the careless and no worry teenagers of the moment. Well done.

BTW your introduction is a bit off putting - let...
Forum: Fiction 04-20-2010, 01:36 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 652
Posted By goldengirl
wow absolutely excellent! The title is fine -...

wow absolutely excellent! The title is fine - don't change it- it signifies everything the story is about.
Forum: Fiction 04-19-2010, 01:27 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 740
Posted By goldengirl
Thanks for the read, Epic - I returned the...

Thanks for the read, Epic - I returned the favour, with a review - check it out

best
gg
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2010, 11:53 PM
Replies: 24
Views: 1,482
Posted By goldengirl
Hi Epic. Si/Fi isn't my genre so this will...

Hi Epic.

Si/Fi isn't my genre so this will be just a few words on style. RED IS WORDS TO CUT

The lonely town surrounded him.I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN, BUT A LONELY TOWN CAN'T SURROUND ANYONE UNLESS...
Forum: Fiction 04-17-2010, 09:06 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 740
Posted By goldengirl
Suzy Blue Eyes

Alan sank into the armchair with a sigh. He was beginning to feel his age, and lately noticed a few white hairs intruding into his dark locks. He reached for the newspaper on the coffee table and...
Forum: Fiction 04-17-2010, 07:48 AM
Replies: 7
Views: 899
Posted By goldengirl
Excellent - original and well put together - get...

Excellent - original and well put together - get it published!
Forum: Fiction 04-16-2010, 07:29 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,177
Posted By goldengirl
AHA - A fan I take it :) Thanks for the...

AHA - A fan I take it :)

Thanks for the read!

gg
Forum: Fiction 04-16-2010, 01:34 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 1,705
Posted By goldengirl
We all got a month’s leave after basic and I...

We all got a month’s leave after basic and I went back to Utah to visit my family before shipping out. It was uneventful but nice. We all knew the possible consequences of what I was doing so...
Forum: Fiction 04-16-2010, 01:19 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,177
Posted By goldengirl
REALLY!! We didn't get to see him in Britain. I...

REALLY!! We didn't get to see him in Britain. I was a fan as a young girl [but not fan-atical.] I liked all blues and soul so he was just one of many that I admired.
Thanks for the read, John.

gg
Forum: Fiction 04-15-2010, 01:51 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,582
Posted By goldengirl
:D:D I did have a look yesterday.

:D:D I did have a look yesterday.
Forum: Fiction 04-15-2010, 10:31 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,177
Posted By goldengirl
Hi Thanks for taking time to review, appreciate...

Hi
Thanks for taking time to review, appreciate it.

gg
Forum: Fiction 04-15-2010, 10:28 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,582
Posted By goldengirl
many thanks, Gaines. Glad you liked it. gg

many thanks, Gaines. Glad you liked it.

gg
Forum: Fiction 04-15-2010, 04:57 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,582
Posted By goldengirl
Thanks monkey, appriecate your feed back. ...

Thanks monkey, appriecate your feed back.

i'll recip soon ;)

gg
Forum: Fiction 04-14-2010, 10:47 AM
Replies: 12
Views: 1,943
Posted By goldengirl
There are several Mags dedicated to this stuff,...

There are several Mags dedicated to this stuff, so you'll have an outlet - Here across the pond these sort of stories are on the up in popularity - but they have to have an edge.
Go for it!
Forum: Fiction 04-14-2010, 10:39 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,582
Posted By goldengirl
Thanks Owen - I've returned the review - ;0

Thanks Owen - I've returned the review - ;0
Forum: Fiction 04-14-2010, 09:24 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,582
Posted By goldengirl
Thanks for the read CR. glad you liked it :)

Thanks for the read CR. glad you liked it :)
Forum: Fiction 04-14-2010, 07:08 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,177
Posted By goldengirl
Hi Owen Thanks so much for your nice review, I...

Hi Owen
Thanks so much for your nice review, I try and recip if I can, so when you next post, do let me know.

gg
Forum: Fiction 04-14-2010, 03:24 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 594
Posted By goldengirl
Wow very Cathrine Cookson. I'm sure it will...

Wow very Cathrine Cookson. I'm sure it will appeal to the many women that enjoy chick flick novels./ Get it written!!
Good luck
GG
Forum: Fiction 04-14-2010, 02:04 AM
Replies: 23
Views: 1,614
Posted By goldengirl
Hi Owen has given you an excellent review and I...

Hi
Owen has given you an excellent review and I agree with all of it, so I'll just take the first para - which in my opinion would stop an editor reading any further.

Something slid into my...
Forum: Fiction 04-12-2010, 08:49 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,582
Posted By goldengirl
Awww, thanks Paco - I don't always write such...

Awww, thanks Paco - I don't always write such poetic prose though LOL
Forum: Fiction 04-12-2010, 08:45 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,582
Posted By goldengirl
Icon12 Thanks for the read Bear - pleased you liked it. ...

Thanks for the read Bear - pleased you liked it.

Mmmm The tense change - yes I was aware of it, but the MC is writing her thoughts, so I think it is okay. But I'm willing to be corrected on this,...
Forum: Fiction 04-12-2010, 08:15 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,582
Posted By goldengirl
Thanks Echo, glad you enjoyed it. I try to recip....

Thanks Echo, glad you enjoyed it. I try to recip. my reviews - just read your story [loved it] and left a note.
gg
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