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marigold_2015 03-03-2016 07:18 AM

Deleted
 
Forget I even asked....

max crash 03-03-2016 12:53 PM

your story was a little to much like the book of Job (king James version of the bible) and it also read way to much like a watchtower story - this may have been your intent --

the end of the story while departing from the watchtower version was not redeeming for this story.

I liked your other story much better and it may be that I'm a wiccan and just didn't like the subject of this story.

while I can't fault your construction or spelling - sorry but I just didn't like the story. other more godly people may.

I guess that makes the score, in my opinion, one excellent and one not so good

keep writing

max

marigold_2015 03-03-2016 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by max crash (Post 717852)
your story was a little to much like the book of Job (king James version of the bible) and it also read way to much like a watchtower story - this may have been your intent --

the end of the story while departing from the watchtower version was not redeeming for this story.

I liked your other story much better and it may be that I'm a wiccan and just didn't like the subject of this story.

while I can't fault your construction or spelling - sorry but I just didn't like the story. other more godly people may.

I guess that makes the score, in my opinion, one excellent and one not so good

keep writing

max


Oh, well I'm actually now a misotheist, not a christian and...do you mean like the actual watchtower?

Yeah my intent wasn't to make it so much like the story of Job but to make it a story that shows what happens when you believe in God and when you're "the perfect christian" - and God fails you. It's the song "Dear God" by XTC and "Where's God" by Insane Clown Posse put in film form. It starts off seeming like a christian film but it's really not.

The ending is supposed to leave people questioning their own thoughts and beliefs in God and I decided to write this story because it's what I'm going through now, so I wrote from personal experience but....


ok, thanks for your feedback. :(

max crash 03-03-2016 06:08 PM

the watch tower is a pamphlet that the 'Jesus Christ of latter day saints' hand out.

misotheist - hatred of (some/all) religion???



max

marigold_2015 03-03-2016 06:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by max crash (Post 717863)
the watch tower is a pamphlet that the 'Jesus Christ of latter day saints' hand out.

misotheist - hatred of (some/all) religion???



max


Ah, I see and no, misotheism revolves around the fact that you believe God exists but that he's nothing more than a cruel, malevolent God who cares nothing for human suffering and tragedies and therefore is not worthy to be served....But maybe this story is too close to home and too personal to do...I thought it sounded interesting though....

clarke1557 08-29-2016 05:56 AM

Really good


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