WritersBeat.com (http://forums.writersbeat.com/index.php)
-   Introductions (http://forums.writersbeat.com/forumdisplay.php?f=2)
-   -   Hello: (http://forums.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=61810)

DoggedDavid 11-27-2017 12:07 PM

Hello, comrades with pens of steel!

I should not have used the word comrades as that will probably offend everyone right of center.

In any event, this is my lame attempt at a comedic introduction.
I have been writing for many years, but only a few of my things have been published,

Although my writing has only been published sporadically, it is far from ineffectual. I am a lawyer, and my legal briefs have given me an income.

I write in many different genres including non fiction essays on political and social phenomena, fiction, poetry and other stuff as well. However, only my non fiction essays have been published.

Since I alluded to politics at the outset, I guess I should address any misconceptions my opening lines may have generated: I am left of center on most issues, but on some issues I am not left wing at all.

My hobbies are unwholesome and not very diverse and consist of such things as eating enormous quantities of unchic, pedestrian dishes such as veal parmigiana hero sandwiches, chicken (I donít know how to spell the second word but it sounds like this: Catch I tory) and anything I can get my greedy hands on; reading old news accounts in the New York Times, from the thirties, to buttress my thesis that Post War America has revised and dismembered history; and, most unfortunately, listening to 60ís rock and roll quite excessively, particularly the British invasion guys.

brianpatrick 11-27-2017 03:22 PM

Welcome you communist bastard!

All hail our loving new father Trumpty, for which we are eternally grateful (especially the comedians).

Youíll probably fit right in.

Sent from my whack-ass dump hole.

DoggedDavid 11-27-2017 05:34 PM

Thanks for saying hello, you fascist enemy of the people!!

The references to political conflicts are giving me sweet recollections of my multifaceted and most of all totally crazy childhood.

I sort of incorporated the cold war into my fantasy life. I have a memoir-like essay of my gang of fellow seven year olds who felt that we had to root out communists where we lived, in Brooklyn New York, and my later skepticism of things like the alt right. I also wrote an ode To Eugene Mc Carthy, who was perhaps the first man in American politics to blaze brilliantly against the Vietnam war, which, in its wierd and sinister metaphors, apprises the conflict as if one were tripping on LSD.

Sorry if I sound like a pretentious son of a bitch. Most of my time is spent with petite bourgeois philistines so when I meet a site where bright people gather, I become very self-conscious and neurotic about my presentation -- and that makes my writing cumbersome and ungainly.

Since I am reminded of my childhood political wars, I will have to ask the guy who just wrote me just what my cousin used to ask me when I was seven:

How many tanks do you have in your army

How many planes do you have in your army

(You say you don't have any weapons)

And then I scream, "You lie, you lie, you lie."

brianpatrick 11-27-2017 05:54 PM

I spend most of my days with construction workers, their dramas, their petty competitions, chasing more dollars I can stuff into my retirement account.

There are some dumb people here, some smart ones, and some that claim to know nothing about any of that.

Glad to have you.

Sent from my whack-ass dump hole.

fleamailman 11-28-2017 03:04 AM

(whereupon the goblin showed up wondering if "partners in crime" wouldn't be a better term than "comrades" would, well at least for those who created worlds out of their pens so to speak, then smiling "...yes we steal your time in whatever you read of us here, and whatever you envision us to be too, you and reader after reader's precious time absorbed into our plots as it were, simply we steal their time then, where being online is virtual reality, and what is virtual reality if not another term for fiction here, not that I make any bones about it though, just it's our trade I guess and their fault for not holding on to that reality when they choose to idle away their time in our fiction here...", the goblin flung his arms wide in a shrug of whatever then, before looking up back at DoggedDavid once more, remarking "...yes we were born both thieves and escape artists too, so I welcome you now but as you can see it's nothing to be proud of really...")

All times are GMT -8. The time now is 02:11 AM.

vBulletin, Copyright © 2000-2006, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.