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Tau 08-01-2012 06:25 AM

Autumn Contest Comments
 
Please leave all comment, questions, and anything else related to this seasons comments in this thread.

The prose thread is here.
The poetry thread is here.

Quetzalcoatl 08-14-2012 08:01 AM

Well, all the entries that I have seen in both forums have been extremely interesting and well written. Looks like I've got some stiff competition.

norvbrooks 08-14-2012 02:30 PM

Autumn Contest (Prose) Message in a Bottle
 
It seems that the theme "Message in a Bottle" - Prose - has inspired nautical storylines in the entries so far. I guess that was to be expected.

Quetzalcoatl - your excerpt from the log of Belle Marie was very well done. I had to read it a second time to make up my mind that it was fictional. A couple of things I had questions about:
In the 12:34 pm entry you wrote
Quote:

"I have decided to make all haste in finding the island."
I don't see any mention of an island before this. Did you intentionally hold back any information about the survivor being on an island?
In the 7:05 am entry
Quote:

"A small puff of smoke rose into the air and the sound of a gunshot was heard a few seconds later."
I question whether the smoke from a flintlock pistol would be visible from a distance. In early morning light the muzzleflash might be.
One last thing, which might be a bit knitpicky, is Jameson a typical Portuguese name?

bmj851 - Ship in the Bottle - very nicely done. I really don't have any comments on the writing. Interesting little fantasy.

Quetzalcoatl 08-14-2012 05:02 PM

I'm glad it was convincing enough that you had to read it twice. Did you also read my poem entry? Its the message that was in the bottle. No, I did not purposely withhold the info, And the smoke just one of the things you get when you figure it out as you type it in the reply box. I'm kinda surprised you didn't comment on the fact that he died of starvation though there was no fresh water. As for Jameson, I have no idea.

norvbrooks 08-14-2012 05:21 PM

Autumn Contest (Prose) Message in a Bottle
 
Quetzalcoatl - yes, I did read the poem but not until I re-read the prose. I thought that was a clever linking of the two entries. I got the impression from the poem that he did end his life before actually starving to death. Yes, technically one dies from a lack of water before the lack of food. However, I didn't really go down that path.

Quetzalcoatl 08-14-2012 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by norvbrooks (Post 521688)
Quetzalcoatl - yes, I did read the poem but not until I re-read the prose. I thought that was a clever linking of the two entries. I got the impression from the poem that he did end his life before actually starving to death.

Well that was his intention, but then he saw possible rescue from the ship and fired his gun to get its attention. At least, thats how I think of it. Anything that anyone writes is up for at least a little interpretation by individuals. Who knows, maybe he had to fight off a giant salt water crocodile.:D

Tau 08-14-2012 10:35 PM

Thank you all to have entered, looks like it will be a very good contest, now I just find some inspiration.

Quetzalcoatl 08-15-2012 06:25 AM

While you're looking, why don't you give each of the contestants a cookie, and I'll give out hot cocoa:cocoa:

norvbrooks 08-18-2012 09:18 PM

Autumn Word Vault(WBQ35) - The Musician
 
Nice little story using all 5 Vault words - well done.

Tau 08-19-2012 02:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quetzalcoatl (Post 521825)
While you're looking, why don't you give each of the contestants a cookie, and I'll give out hot cocoa:cocoa:

:cookie: :cookie2: :cookie3:

norvbrooks 08-22-2012 07:40 AM

Autumn Contest (Poetry) Message in a Bottle - MAROONED
 
Agatha - I liked the flow of your poem - it read very well. With all the dark writings which seems to be popular, I found your story line refreshing.

norvbrooks 09-05-2012 09:53 PM

Message in a Bottle (Prose) - Kensington Vault
 
I really enjoyed reading this. It kept me hooked racing to the conclusion. I think I got the message within the story. Well written.


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